The Mostly Danger-less Game Page #6

• Humour
• Satire
• Short story
• Fiction

								


As the barrel came level with his face Montigue felt a close cousin to genuine fear stir in his heart for the first time. He swallowed hard and looked into Ludwig’s eyes, his insanity flashing out of them. Sweet jesus he’s really off his rocker! He thought.   

“Victory!” The prince howled.

In his own mind, the prince was hot on the trail. They had thought this woodman would be a challenge, did they? Well, he had been at first, ever so slightly perhaps. But once Ludwig had caught the scent it was child’s play! See now?! There! What was that?!

The gorgeous man beast slinked stealthily from out of foliage, just as Ludwig knew he would. He had the magnificently vile appearance of all peasants. Crude and barbarous yes in it’s own strange way perfect. Somewhere between animal and man. He was moving fast, another instant and he’d disappear back into the underbrush.

‘Tallyho!” Ludwig bellowed triumphantly.

The woodsman, peasant, animal, man froze, stunned that it had been seen. “Thought you could outfox Ludwig the Indestructible, eh? Ha! Now meet your fate devil!” The magnificent bastard got the look in his eyes that they all got in the end. Panic overcoming whatever base reason it possessed. Ludwig dashed forward, raising his rifle and locking eyes with his quarry. “Victory!”

It is safe to assume that “Victory”, was the last thought to pass through Prince Ludwig of Upper Cracotia’s head before it was abruptly separated from his neck. While it was later found in a tree, mostly intact and still wearing the coonskin cap at the jaunty angle, the torso it had previously been attached had been all but destroyed. Thus making the traditional state funeral impossible. It seems that an antique rifle, accustomed to firing blank cartridges for multiple years, when made to fire live ammunition, can have the unfortunate tendency to function less like a gun and more like a large pipe bomb.

Montigue suffered a brief loss of hearing because of his proximity to the blast. Fortunately, this cleared up in ample time for his wedding to Joanne. He was given a stipend large enough to allow him and his new bride to retire to the country on a small farm. When asked about how he had come into his money he would reply he had some luck when a eccentric rich relation died. This was close enough to the truth to make sure nothing more was asked.

Bernard was initially given a traditional sentence of death by hanging, drawing, and quartering. This however was commuted to three days in a pillory followed by exile. He went on to become a successful gong farmer in Hungraland. He remained unwed.

The Kingdom of Upper Cracotia was in a bit of a bind seeing as Ludwig with no offspring or appointed heir. There was about a week in which it seemed there might be a civil war between the noble houses but ultimately it turned out no one really wanted the job enough to fight for it. A provisional government was formed with the goal of finding a new ruler and after about another week it was decided that that too was a bit more trouble than it was worth and that the entire business of monarchy and Princes was becoming a bit passe. The Kingdom of Cracotia became the Republic of Cracotia, run a by parliament. 

Chancellor Higgens become Prime Minister Higgens. He would in later days be heralded as the Father of The Nation. The first act of the new parliament was to declare the Castle Balfor and it’s hunting grounds a public park. Hunting of any form was strictly prohibited.




     




       
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