Echoes of Regret Page #2

• Drama

								


"Of course, happy anniversary!" she said cheerfully, her smile widening as she checked her list. "Right this way."

I followed her through the maze of tables, each one adorned with crisp white linens and flickering candles. The hum of quiet conversations. We reached a small, intimate table by the window, offering a view of the city lights.

"Here you are, sir," the hostess said, pulling out a chair for me. "Your waitress will be with you shortly."

"Thank you," I said, taking a seat. The chair was surprisingly comfortable, and I allowed myself to relax just a little. I glanced around, admiring the polished wood floors and the artwork that adorned the walls. Despite my earlier frustration, I couldn't help but appreciate the beauty of the place.

A waitress appeared moments later, carrying a menu and a pleasant smile. "Good evening, sir. Can I get you anything while you wait for your wife?"

"A glass of red wine, please," I replied. "Something full-bodied."

"Absolutely. I'll be right back with that." She handed me the menu and disappeared, leaving me to contemplate my options.

As I waited, I tried to push thoughts of work out of my mind. Tonight was supposed to be special, a celebration of our time together. I glanced at my watch, hoping my wife would arrive soon. The day had been rough, but being here, in this beautiful restaurant, waiting to share a meal with the woman I loved, made it all seem a bit more bearable.

My waitress came by to bring me a third glass of wine. “Would you like anything else while you wait?”  

“No. Thank you.” I grumbled. The longer I waited the more difficult it was to keep my mind calm. Thoughts of my terrible day, June's disregard for my time, and my overall disappointment spun around in my mind creating a storm, one I was trying hard to settle.  

I sent June a text. 

“Where are you?” 

Three dots appear and disappear. It takes a full 3 minutes for a response. 

“I’m 5 minutes away! Sorry my last client took forever!” 

“Ok. See you soon.” I replied. My temperature began cooling once I knew she was coming, but then I realized she has a thirty minute drive, couldn’t she have been a little more considerate? She should’ve let me know she was running late. I felt like an Idiot sitting alone for so long with my wife’s wilting roses. 

The hostess brought over my bubbly, smiling June to the table. With a half-hearted smile, I stood up, grabbed the bouquet, and handed it to my wife with a small peck on the cheek. “I’m glad you could make it,” I said, letting a bit of snark seep into my tone.

June’s green eyes widened, glistening. She gave me a look that reminded me of a chastised child. “I really am sorry I was late,” she whispered. “And the flowers are beautiful, thank you.”

“Let’s forget about it and enjoy our evening,” I said, digressing. I wanted to feel happy, and starting an argument wouldn’t help. June’s face lit up with relief.

We ordered our meal, and while waiting for our food, I decided to give her my gift. I slid a small red box with a tiny white bow across the table. Inside was a white-gold diamond bracelet. She squealed upon opening it, her enthusiastic expression filling me with warmth, like the sun calming my storm.

“You like it?” I asked, already knowing the answer.

“Oh, Warren, I absolutely adore it!” she replied, blowing me multiple kisses. “I have a gift for you too,” she added with a sly smile.

She pulled an envelope from her handbag and handed it to me. I was slightly annoyed—she knew I didn’t like store-bought cards—but I did my best not to show my vexation.

I opened the card, and a small piece of glossy paper fell out. I picked it up off the table and stared at it, confused for a moment. It was an image, grainy and black-and-white. As the seconds ticked by, my mind scrambled to make sense of it. It looked like…

A sonogram.

My heart pounded. “Are you? Are we?” I asked clumsily, my voice barely above a whisper.

June nodded her head frantically. “I am! We are having a baby!”

All the troubles from the day faded into darkness, and all I could see was our bright future. I leapt from the seat and ran to the mother of our future child, placing a hand on her belly. I kissed her on the lips. “This is the most unexpected and wonderful anniversary gift! I love you.” With tears streaming down her face, June swore she loved me more.

The turbulence of the day would sneak back into my mind while lying in bed that night. After making love to my wife, she wrapped herself around me like a body pillow and I played with her long hair as she fell asleep. I spent the next several hours staring at our popcorn ceiling specked sparingly with tiny flecks of white glitter. I could not stop replaying my agitations from the long day I just lived through, along with the anxiety of becoming a parent and what that would mean for our life. I admit I had fears of the unknown. I worried about the financial burden of expanding my family.

I slipped out of June’s grasp to go grab some water from the kitchen. As I walked to the kitchen I picked up June’s clothes she’d left on the floor and tossed them into the laundry basket. I found her phone on the stand in the hallway and her keys on the counter. I put all of her things in her purse.

Once in the kitchen, I saw her water bottles from the day about to fall out of the overly stuffed garbage can. I rolled my eyes at her inability to take out the garbage and did it myself. It was simply one more burden to add to an already taxing day. 

Having a baby can change your life’s trajectory. You don’t always get the chance to actively choose the direction it will take. A new life should always be a celebration, but you must prepare for the obstacle course that awaits.

Year 3

On February 20th, a child was born amidst screams of anguish. They say a mother’s love has no limits, but for some, it can take time to develop.

“Please get out of bed, June. I really have to go to work!” I begged her, holding our two-week-old, crying daughter, Heather, in my arms.

She turned over, covering her head with the blanket. “Can’t you just call off today?” she asked, her voice devoid of emotion.

June had barely looked at Heather since leaving the hospital, claiming she was too tired and still recovering. The room felt colder each day, the unspoken distance between us growing. Her eyes, once full of warmth and light, now seemed hollow, reflecting the exhaustion and emotional numbness that had consumed her.

Heather’s cries pierced my eardrums. I raised my voice. “No! I have been off for two weeks unpaid. If you’d like to keep a roof over our heads, I need to go in.” Frustration boiled over. “Get up!”

June flung the comforter off and sat up, her movements jerky and strained. “Fine! Give her to me and leave!” The anger in her was as evident as my own, but behind it lay a deep well of despair and helplessness. Her gaze fell on Heather, and I could see the internal struggle on her face—fueled by guilt and ambiguity, like she was fighting against an invisible force that made caring seem impossible.

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