Japanese Girls and Women: Revised and Enlarged Edition

								

comfort of those around them. A Japanese child seems to be the product
of a more perfect civilization than our own, for it comes into the world
with little of the savagery and barbarian bad manners that distinguish
children in this country, and the first ten or fifteen years of its life
do not seem to be passed in one long struggle to acquire a coating of
good manners that will help to render it less obnoxious in polite
society. How much of the politeness of the Japanese is the result of
training, and how much is inherited from generations of civilized
ancestors, it is difficult to tell; but my impression is, that babies
are born into the world with a good start in the matter of manners, and
that the uniformly gentle and courteous treatment that they receive from
those about them, together with the continual verbal teaching of the
principle of self-restraint and thoughtfulness of others, produce with
very little difficulty the universally attractive manners of the people.
One curious thing in a Japanese household is to see the formalities that
pass between brothers and sisters, and the respect paid to age by every
member of the family. The grandfather and grandmother come first of all
in everything,--no one at table must be helped before them in any case;
after them come the father and mother; and lastly, the children
according to their ages. A younger sister must always wait for the elder
and pay her due respect, even in the matter of walking into the room
before her. The wishes and convenience of the elder, rather than of the
younger, are to be consulted in everything, and this lesson must be
learned early by children. The difference in years may be slight, but
the elder-born has the first right in all cases.
Our little girl's place in the family is a pleasant one: she is the pet
and plaything of father and elder brothers, and she is never saluted by
any one in the family, except her parents, without the title of respect
due to her position. If she is the eldest daughter, to the servants she
is O J[=o] Sama, literally, young lady; to her own brothers and sisters,
Né San, elder sister. Should she be one of the younger ones, her given
name, preceded by the honorific O and followed by San, meaning Miss,
will be the name by which she will be called by younger brothers and
sisters, and by the servants. As she passes from babyhood to girlhood,
and from girlhood to womanhood, she is the object of much love and care
and solicitude; but she does not grow up irresponsible or untrained to
meet the duties which womanhood will surely bring to her. She must learn
all the duties that fall upon the wife and mother of a Japanese
household, as well as obtain the instruction in books and mathematics
that is coming to be more and more a necessity for the women of Japan.
She must take a certain responsibility in the household; must see that
tea is made for the guests who may be received by her parents,--in all